Sunday, January 01, 2012

The Year of Ketchup



2012 is officially the year of ketchup. Without reason, I abandoned ketchup as a small child in the early ‘70s and never looked back. It did not help that I was forced to eat it as a “vegetable” in elementary school. But much time has passed. This year, I’m opening my mind. I’m giving ketchup another chance.

It’s also the year of Mexico. My wife and I will be vacationing in Riviera Maya in March. In preparation, I’ll be dropping 15 pounds and listening to many different versions of “La Bamba”. Which reminds me…

It’s also the year of the ‘50s. For my entire adult life, I’ve been obsessed with the popular culture of the ‘70s. Seven of my ten favorite bands of all-time were from the ‘70s. Seven of my ten favorite movies of all-time were from the ‘70s. It’s time to take it a little further back. I’m going to watch On The Waterfront twice. I might even get an Esquerita tattoo.

It’s also the year of the novel. I did not read a single novel in 2011. In 2012, I plan to read at least three. Hell, I might even write one, too.

It’s also the year of the English pale ale. Boddingtons, Fuller’s London Pride, Old Speckled Hen, Tetley’s…You name it, I’ll drink it.

It’s also the year of the guns. No more prioritizing shoulders and back in the gym. In 2012, it’s biceps and triceps out the wazoo.

It’s also the year of chicken wings. Last year was the year of burgers, and that went swimmingly.

It’s also the year of shaving. Last year I shaved only once or twice a week. I pretended this was because I was “rationing” razor blades, but really it was because I was lazy. This year I’m going to shave daily. I enjoy lathering up, listening to Little Steven’s Underground Garage channel on SiriusXM, and getting a good, clean shave. Life is about simple pleasures. 

And of course every year is the year of lists. This year’s lists will include the top ten albums of 1982, the top ten albums of 2002, the top ten bands of the 1990s, the ten greatest songs of all-time, and the 12 most underrated punk bands of all-time. Stay tuned!

- L.R.

3 comments:

SHAWΠ ABΠOXIOUS said...

Yeah! The year of NOVELS... rah!

gunther said...

I'm out of shaving cream, but there's lots of ketchup in the fridge. Maybe I should use some on my face.

Lord Rutledge said...

You could also try oatmeal...it's good for the complexion.