The Best Thing I Ever Ate

Should I ever be sentenced to execution for suspected acts of revolt against the Powers That Be, I do hope I will be granted a last meal request. I’d have many options to consider. Personal favorites like kielbasa, brats, a Philly cheesesteak (with onions and Whiz), a Steak N’ Shake triple (with fries, a vanilla Coke, and a vanilla shake), bangers & mash (at The Still in Timonium, Maryland), a Miami-style Cuban, and a Primanti Brothers kolbassi and cheese (with egg!) would all be in the running. But the ultimate winner would be Tony Packo’s - an icon of Toledo, Ohio since 1932 and home to the best hot dogs you’ll ever taste. A hot dog at Packo’s is not a hot dog in the traditional sense but rather a Hungarian sausage on a bun. It’s thick and juicy and supremely delicious, and when you take that first bite you get that nice crunch from the casing. Mmmm! No other dog can touch this! With this being my last meal and all, I would not screw around. I’d get the M.O.A.D. (“mother of all dogs”), which is four times the size of a regular Packo’s dog and comes on a foot-long roll topped with chili and shredded cheese. I’d take that bad boy down and then do my best “Freedom!” cry a la Mel Gibson in Braveheart. My sides would be paprikas dumplings and sweet hot pickles, and I’d stretch out my stomach with a cup of chili. I consider myself quite the connoisseur of chili. I’ve had chili everywhere, and Packo’s has the very best. It’s all in the Hungarian spices! And although some of the Packo’s locations only serve swill beer, I’ve come to associate the Packo’s experience with exactly that. I always have my Packo’s meals with a draught of Labatt Blue (arguably the best of all swill beers), and that’s how I like it. If any of you are co-conspirators of mine and wind up along for the last meal ride, surely you’ll find something to your liking on the Packo’s menu. The stuffed cabbage, chili mac, fried green pickles, chili sundae, and chicken paprikas are all the stuff of legend – or at least they should be. A Packo family feud now has this T-Town institution in legal and financial trouble, and should it be forced to close I will weep openly for days if not weeks. Oh, you mighty M.O.A.D.! I will see you in ten days!

- L.R.

http://www.tonypackos.com/